Regarding age disparity - is a 19 year old dating a 16 year old weird? Before you ask, I'm not worried about the legal stuff because the age of consent where I live is Not interested in things getting sexual anyway. So I'm really into a sophomore in high school who's 16, turning 17 this October.
I've genuinely never had as much in common with someone as I do her and I enjoy talking to her over text messages and facebook. We aren't dating yet, but we've shown mutual interest in each other. I would very much like for this person to be a part of my life. Unfortunately, as a freshman in college who is turning 20 in four months, I feel extremely weird in this position, and the friends I've spoken to about it don't support me. I can't really blame them.
I'll turn 20 three months before she turns 17, and even though that's just three months apart, being a 20 year old dating a 16 year old still makes me feel weird. I certainly don't feel 20, and one year ago I was still in high school, but I can't argue with the numbers, and the numbers say that I'm a creep. I don't think 3 years is really that far apart, but it's gonna be "a thing" until she's But even then, she'll still be in high school.
As a side note, she has a brother who's, like, 22 and probably pretty protective of her. I'm just looking for feedback. I don't think I'm willing to date her at this exact point in time.
Thanks for reading and hopefully providing some feedback. I'm very torn right now. I really appreciate all of the comments, guys. I can't say reading these responses and having 12 hours to mull things over is enough to make a decision, so I can't really promise that I'll be updating this thread with a final decision.
It's giving me a lot to consider though, and it really just helps to receive opinions. Half your age plus seven. So you're on the borderline. I guess if you're in the states you're both too young to drink so you have that in common.
Look at this way OP - in only two years she'll be eighteen and you'll be twenty one. That's pretty clearly in not-weird territory. I'd say you're close to the edge of acceptability, but as long as you're not taking advantage of some naive young girl which is why those laws exist in the first place I'd say you're all good.
Alright so heres the deal. I was in the exact same Plus another brother, and an older sister position as you, 19 year old dating 16. Met a girl through some friends, spent some time together, hit it off, and I find out she's 16, meanwhile I'm I hit the brakes, wondering what the fuck am I going to do?
I'm in Canada, age of consent is 16, so all is well legally My morals were conflicted, but she doesn't look 16, and she doesn't act like a 16 year old So I took the jump We've been together about 9 months now, and I haven't looked back since.
People gave me shit for it almost every time they heard how old she was, but you just gotta brush it off. We shared so much in common, and she both looked older, and was far more mature than most people I can remember being when I was that age I actually thought she was around her early 20's when I met her that when we went out for dinner, or on a date, no one gave us weird looks.
The hardest part about dating someone that is in a different point in their life You in College, her still in high school is that her parents are going to see you as a total scum bag, that probably only wants in her pants. You need to really, really make an effort to get her family to accept you, and grow to like, and eventually love you. I'm 20 now, she's 17, I've met most of her immediate family, I spent countless hours in the summer doing household work for her mom, and shooting the shit with her Dad when he visited.
Her sister, and one of her brothers He's 22 I'm still not quite sure how they feel about me, but her oldest brother 30 really likes me, I talk to the guy almost everyday at this point.
Really in the end it's all about how you present yourself to her family, and if you're able to show you've got the backbone to stand up for their daughter, love her, and not just trying to bone her, then fuck what everyone else thinks, do what makes you happy. When I consider the changes I experienced in attitude, general knowledge of how the world works, maturity, sense of empathy, 19 year old dating 16, etc. I just couldn't imagine you having all that much in common in the end.
Its your and her decision ultimately, but don't be surprised if you don't 19 year old dating 16 seem to be able to communicate well. Sure you might get some ass hat parents now an again but most should be pretty chill. Like for me her mom was a crazy person who needs to be locked up in a padded room but her dad is an awesome guy.
They just wanted there daughter to be happy and she was when she was with me so really they were not going to say no. PLus we were so into eachother saying no would just be words.
You've been shamed into thinking it's bad to date younger, attractive girls but it's completely normal and healthy. If the average guy was being honest with himself he'd admit that teenage girls are the hottest girls around. But if it's not legal then yeah that's a huge problem. I mean I had friends that were in 19 year old dating 16, he was a senior and he dated a freshmen and they ended up dating for 4 years before getting married so the circumstances wasn't weird for them.
Actually we started dating when i was 17 and she was and then i was 18 when she was Sure we got lots of people making jokes on us and we had to be careful about her parents and what not but really it did not effect like at all. We were just goo goo over each other and it really did not matter. Talk to her brother and see how he feels about it.
If you show good intentions and won over his trust then maybe things will go easier on that front. On the other hand don't worry about age, when you get older years age difference is very common at least what I've seen and no one has an issue with it. Society has placed a set of guidelines over younger people to "protect" the young people from things like this but I see it as no problem as long as you're not crossing any boundaries.
It's legal, who's gives a shit. As long as you're mentally at a similar level, relax. I don't think it's that weird. A little unconventional but don't let that scare you.
I say go for it and fuck anyone who thinks it's wrong. It's none of their business. I think it would be weird if she had JUST turned 16, like, yesterday, and you were gonna turn 20 tomorrow.
Otherwise it doesn't seem that weird. Anyway, if you can remain friends until you're both of age, maybe you can pursue a relationship then, based on your successful friendship. Spending any significant time together is going to be difficult under those circumstances, because everyone is going to question your intentions. But, if you can hold out and begin a relationship later, when it's more "appropriate," no one will give a shit. For instance, I'm 8 years older than my wife.
When we first met I was 26 and she was That would have been weird. We got back in touch via the internet at 32 and 24 respectively, and there was nothing weird about that. It's all about timing, man. You're a different person at 16 than you are 18 than you are at If you begin a relationship now, not only will it be considered inappropriate by everyone surrounding your lives family, friends, etc.
It's more the college kid dating a high school sophomore thing that makes it weird rather than just the age difference. I think it's possibly just OK if she's very mature for her age. It would definitely be wise to wait until she's older though. It's not like you're forty. My granddad was 20 and my granny 15 when they met. Age of consent may be 16 where you live, but the key issue isn't her consent.
Anyways, I think it's strange, but the age difference is only 3 years. Frankly I don't understand the idea of dating someone that you're not interested in sexually, but hey, it's your life, and that does make things easier. It's not weird because of age of consent thing or she's too young. It's weird because you're at fundamentally different points in one's life.
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Home Get advice Give advice Topics Columnists -! I'm a 19 year old female, and I am dating a 16 year old boy. He will be 17 in July, as I will be 20 in October. We have been dating a few months now. I don't know if we should be doing this. I've received mixed opinions from those around me. Some have said to continue dating him, as we have feelings for each other, and that age is just a number. Where as others have said they don't believe it's right, or moral. He doesn't think like a 16 year old boy.
He doesn't even live with his parents, or even family for that matter. He works, lives on his own with roommates. Has his own car. If you need more details, let me know, but I think this should be enough for you to help me. I should probably add that I didn't go into this looking for anything serious, it wasn't supposed to be serious at all.
It was supposed to be some fun for the both of us, and he got more involved emotionally than I did for the first few months, I'm just now developing feelings of wanting some kind of relationship with him because he's shown me that it's what HE wants, and it's something he can handle, so far to be honest he's handling it better than I am. Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: I don't personally think age matters, but that is just me. Age difference can, however, have major effects on your relationship.
I understand the whole more mature for his age, because I was like that. I have not lived with my mother since I was , I grew up way before most teens did.
If you want to be with him, be with him, if you don't, don't. There will be challenges along the way, but there are with any relationship. I really don't think that age is a big deal.
A boy I was seeing was 19 and I am I think you should just do what you want, if you said you were like 23 and he was 16 then I would have thought differently. The straight answer would be whether he lives on is own or not it's illegal. However, This one is up to you after all he does live on his own etc. It's about what you like and want despite him being on his own etc.
Remember that he is only 16 and probably has a lot of growing up to do yet alone is still in the dating around stage. Most 16 year old's are not ready to settle down and commit themselves into a relationship. This is were I say if you want a man you might want to look elsewhere. Also, for the age part if you DO decide to stay with him remember there are always those people that are going to turn there heads and stare there really is no way to completely avoid that.
As long as you are both happy, the age difference is no matter. It is only three years and the only thing that people have issues with is that he's still considered a minor, but three years will not matter when he's Grit your teeth through all the negative things people say and do what makes you happy.
If you really love him and like him and want to spend time with him, then don't let other people's thoughts get in the way. Just because some people might not think its right, doesn't mean you need to listen to them and make them happy. I know thats technically considered selfish.. If you think its wrong, then dont do it. Want to give advice? Click here to start your own advice column!
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Sep 30, · I am a 16 year old girl who is in love with a 19 year old. Do u think its ok for us to date?Status: Resolved. Is it okay for a year-old to go out with a year-old? Update Cancel. ad by Truthfinder. Why is a year-old dating a year-old "wrong" to most people. Jul 01, · 19 Year Old Dating 16 Year Old My question involves criminal law for the state of: Indiana. My name is Jesse, and I'm a 19 year old girl (20 in Jan. ), dating a 16 year old boy (17 in Sept. ).
Saunder Can a 16 year old girl date a 19 year old boy. He's a friend of my and we ment when he was still in high school. When I'm around him it's a little clear that he likes me too. Jul 01, · 19 Year Old Dating 16 Year Old My question involves criminal law for the state of: Indiana. My name is Jesse, and I'm a 19 year old girl (20 in Jan. ), dating a 16 year old boy (17 in Sept. ).